Spanish cow

Jaws Gets Panned By Granny.

They often say that older generations were made a lot tougher; and a story like this one makes you wonder if it’s true.

If I got attacked by a five-foot killer fish then I’m pretty sure I’d be paralysed with fear. But not this shark’s-ass-kicking grandma…

Paddy Trumball was out snorkelling off the coast of Queensland when it all happened (and just how many snorkelling grandmothers do you know?)… Apparently, she was approached by the shark and then badly bitten several times. But this lady wasn’t going to be no easy lump of fish food.

After repeatedly thumping the aquatic killing machine on the snout, it got a bit miffed and tried to give her a good old-fashioned ‘death-roll’. But Paddy was having none of that! Unable to punch her attacker any longer, she decided to give him a good kicking – around the neck.

Wow. There is no way that I’d want to get on the wrong side of this old girl! And I’ll bet the shark was pleased to see the back of her as well. I dread to think of the amount of gore that would come about if this lady was attacked by a mugger. She’d beat any healthy young hoodlum to a bloody pulp.

Maybe this old dear could call up her bingo companions and get a task force together. Having people like this patrolling the streets of Britain would have a major impact on crime figures. And they wouldn’t even need to be paid that much because they’d already have their own pension schemes in place!

Seriously though, I wonder how many young people would have managed to survive a shark attack? You would have to be incredibly determined and very, very brave. Paddy Trumball is going to be alright, but she lost three pints of blood during her battle with the beast, it seems to me that this is one woman that needs to apply to Locum vet jobs.